Or really mothers & their boys ... So as this is written, my daughter is 5 1/2 & my son 4 1/2.
My new obsession is looking for men that have good relationships with their mothers. They respect her, like to call her & spend time with her. Mostly I see men who love their mothers, but live far away, check in infrequently & or kinda forget about her...
Which brings me to - I'm terrified of 'losing' my son. He is sweet, kind, cuddly, sincere. He brings me a present every day - usually a leaf. My daughter has always been strong, spirited & independent, which I can relate to better than this softer little boy. So as I work with her, do things with her, spend time with her, him I hold, I kiss, I stare at.
Based on my relationship with my mother, my friends with their mothers, I'm hoping that my daughter & I will always have a strong & mostly positive relationship. I understand it will change, she will at some point think I'm crazy, then come back to me. We will plan her wedding, we'll discuss every aspect of her first pregnancy & commiserate how long the second one seems to last. We'll shop, cook, garden & drink wine.
But my son... I know he's going to leave me. He will at some point need to pull away, or he'll be the dreaded "MAMA'S BOY". My friend's mother made a good point, that he will go through things in those middle & high school years that make me want to let him go. He won't be this cute little boy; he'll be a big dirty boy that does gross things. That comforts me a bit, maybe it'll be a little easier ... but it's still looming.
So I've decided to enjoy him and follow his lead. I'll show him I'm constant in his life, be at his sporting things or concerts. We'll laugh, get ice cream & go for bike rides. I'll remind my husband to call his mother so that my son learns by example. This will work, right?? and then when he's all grown up, his wife will love me & they'll move in down the street.
But for now, he's still falling asleep in my bed & sitting in my lap, no matter how much harassment I get from my husband.